and BREATHE!

First time in many years that I have had > 7 days off in a row (except for breaking my leg several years ago).  This is my 8th unemployed day.  I've noticed that all the people I interact with are much nicer.  I'm not silly enough to believe that everyone else in the world suddenly changed, it MUST be me.  Am I being nicer??  I think so.  I know I'm smiling more.  It was SO time to leave that job.  I am suitably freaked out that I do not have a job yet.  I know for sure I will have SOMETHING that pays money within 1.5 weeks.  I have checked my bank account repeatedly to re-assure myself that we will be o.k.  The money from the truck sale is helping give a little cushion.  Unfortunately, my paid off credit card is not so paid off any more.  That will get fixed.  I am writing cover letters, learning about the changes in job hunting over the last 11 years, and getting all my paperwork together for the temp nursing agencies.   I was going to try to get scrubs from GoodWill or ARC but I wated too long.  Checked 3 stores Friday and there wasn't much choice because people had cleaned them out for Halloween. 

In addition, I've managed to get ALL the dirty clothes off my closet floor.  Haven't done that in many months.  I'm about to finish the last 2 loads today.  I gave up on my camera, found a good sale and got another one.  Not a good choice when I don't have any money coming in...  Good choice for blogland though.  There will finally be pictures back in my blog. 

In the spirit of BREATHE...  smoking stops tomorrow.  This seems a good time.  New car that I don't want to smell like smoke and applying for jobs that are not smoking compatible.  I don't have to worry about alcohol interference because it's not in the budget.  Also, my CPR class confirmed all my worst fears about my current physical condition.  It was pitiful.  I just can't present myself to patients as a nurse, like this.  Besides, one month of cigarettes will pay for that new camera. 

So, here we go again!!  Last time!!  Me & You Together. 

Hope all is well.  Thanks for hanging in with me while I was maxed out at the end of the job. 
Take care and be gentle with each other.  I'll keep you posted.

On Bruce and Margie

I started getting caught up with my bloggers yesterday morning.  The first thing I realized was that we had lost some friends.  I was so sad, haven't cried that hard in a while.  How kind it was for their daughter to get on Margie's blog and get us updated.  I was hoping to meet Margie some day and get all her Weight Watcher's RV eating success secrets.  Another opportunity missed while I wait to get on the road. 

My attitude about death is unusual, and something I don't share with most people.  When I get so sad, I know it's sadness for me and for their family.  We will miss them.  Our lives are diminished without them around for us to touch.  There is not an ounce of me that is sad for the dead ones.  They've got it made!  Joy and giggles are found as I think of what they get to do, and not do, now....

--  Their rig will never break down
--  They never have to dump another tank
--  The weather will never be too hot, too humid, too cold, or too anything. 
--  They will never have to fill the rig with gas again. 
--  No bumpy roads or rude neighbors
--  No accidents, EVER
--  No insurance to pay or paperwork to deal with. 
--  No points to count or dishes to wash
--  No dog poop to pick up
--  They can be anywhere, anytime, as fast or as slow as they want to get there. 
--  No unruly crowds or long lines. 
--  There will always be a perfect spot for their rig, with a fabulous view and with any hook-ups they want. 
--  Money is never a problem
--  No sadness, no worry.  Only play and joy and friends and beauty.
--  They get to watch and be with all their family & friends all the time. 

I could go on and on.  Still writing through tears.  I am sad for myself.  For all of us that will never get to meet Bruce and Margie in this life.  So sad for their family.  My prayers and good thoughts are with them. 

Phew! Lots of change

So, I've been officially unemployed for 5 days.  I've filled out online applications for 2 local hospitals.  I'm just not sure what kind of direct patient care I'm most interested in.  I REALLY want a job at the dialysis center.  I'm leaning more & more towards agency nursing.  I've been working on getting my paper work together.  The stuff I will need to get a job agency nursing.   There is a little part of me that thinks...  I agency nursing works out for me, maybe I could hit the road in 2011 instead of 2012.  That makes me giggle a little :0)  I just have no idea what I would do with the dogs if I had to go out to work 40 hours per week.  I have a daycare place for them here.  Could I find that in every other place I work?  I'm getting ahead of myself.  Spending my days focused on relocating all my marbles.  Catching up on housework.  This is my second day of laundry.  Didn't even realize I had that many clothes.  I'm going to take my CPR class this afternoon and I'm going by Goodwill to look for scrubs.  I've found my stethescope and my nursing shoes but I need some white socks and new work panties.  I know,  TMI.  The most fun is I get to try some catch up on my blog buddies this morning. 

Hope all is well and going smoothly.  Take care and be gentle with each other. 

Bitter Sweet?

My last day at the call center.   I've had soooo many sweet e-mails.  I realize what affect I can have.  I've never really understood what bittersweet was until tonight.  I will progress and pay my bills and feed my canine family.  I will!!!!     It will be o.k.  I am a fighter... I am working for my dream!!!

Quick Note

Yee HA!  Actually got 7 straight hours of sleep last night.  This will be my last day working in the office and the dogs first ride in the new car.  Could be an adventure.  Also have to get the new car's oil changed & fluids checked for winter.  Leaving to do that in about 10 minutes. 

Answering questions:  List of towable vehicles with all the pertinent info can be found at the motorhome magazine website.  They do a "Dinghy Round-up" each year, for the past few years.  The articles are in adobe format on the web.  Check this link.  http://www.motorhomemagazine.com/dinghytowingguide/  
Yes, some of the cars are automatics.  This is the list I started my hunt with, and the one I kept referring to, during my car hunt. 

Take care everyone!  Be gentle with each other. 

Kind of Still Waiting, Kind of on the Road

O.k.  so I put in my notice at work, and I don't have a job to go to and I just took on a loan and bought a new (to me) car.  Sounds like a mess Huh?  I know, it sounds like a mess to my inner financial manager I've been working so hard to develop for the last year (remember? me,  money management, not my strong point, have to fix that before I go on road..  It's been getting better but now she's got this irritating banshee like wail going on in my head.  My mother was never this much of a nag.)

You will have to forgive me, this schedule is still killing me.  I get about one day a week when I get a full 8 hours, uninterrupted sleep.  I have always known I needed 7-8 hour sleep a night to function well, but I've never gone this long, this sleep deprived.  I've found that I become a total, flakey, ditzy, unfocused, tearful, mess when I don't get enough sleep.  I was hanging in and waiting for a new job to come through.  Needless to say, the descriptors I gave in the previous sentence do not add up to a strong interviewee :0).  I haven't gotten any offers.  I have some vacation time built up at work, my plan was to request days off here and there so I could hang in there until a new job came through.  Then I discovered I had made a mistake.  It wasn't a dangerous or horrible mistake.  No one was hurt,  I'm not sure anyone else even noticed, it was all fine.  It wasn't a mistake I ever would have made if I was getting enough sleep.   To me, it was a signal, a red flag that it was time to go.  I submitted 3 weeks notice the day I found the mistake.  So my last day is October 23rd.  Since I totally blew an interview (I won't go into details, it involved crying.  If the place made me an offer I wouldn't work for them because they are obviously stupid or so desperate they've lost all sense of judgement), I've quit interviewing until I get my schedule back on track.  I will be doing agency nursing until something better comes up.  That involves lots of flexibility and hard work.  Time to dig out the stethescope, nursing shoes and scrubs I haven't used in years.    It's not easy work, but it will pay the bills, hopefully the perfect job will come in soon. 

In the mean time, I have to get my toad before I leave my job so I will still qualify for a loan.  My friends; flaky, crazy and  easily distracted were shopping for a toad :0)  What a circus.  Let's just have a moment of silence for the poor car salesmen I dealt with.  My short term memory is useless at this point.  Here I am with my list of towable cars, and my edmonds.com evaluations for the cars I'm interested in, trying to explain the the salesman why I could care less about the colors or the options the car has.  Also trying to explain that the towable and curb weight part of the equation are deal breakers.  So, I pick up my new (to me) car on Friday.  The man will pay me for the rest of the truck and pick it up on Saturday morning.  My last day of work is one week from Saturday.  ARGH!!!!

If you want to check it out, my toad is a 2009 Chevy HHT in dark Grey.  Front wheel drive, automatic.  It has lot's of cargo space for the crazy dogs and the whole cargo area is covered in hard plastic.  Cargo area is big enough that I will be able to haul my bicycle in the car when I'm on the road.  It is kind of funny looking, but cute, and it's growing on me.  According to edmonds, I got a very fair price on the car. 

Counting my Blessings: 

• Crazy dogs that are as baffled by weird schedule as I am.  They make me smile every day
• My sense of humor (if you've seen the dog in the movie UP!, I am him these days... SQUIRREL!)
• My nursing license that gives me earning power no matter what. 

So sorry for long time between posts.  I will keep you posted.  Hope all is well out there is blog land.  Be gentle with each other.